“it takes getting everything you ever wanted and then losing it, to know what true freedom is”
If a woman seems too smart or accomplished, she’s typecast as “non-dating material.” If she’s witty and competitive, she’s viewed as challenging and overbearing. Society has come to teach women that being funny and smart won’t get you dates, but empty heads and shallow hearts.
- Oh well! Haha. Not our fault.
"That’s what people say - it’s not goodbye - when they’re afraid to face they are really feeling. I am not going to see you tomorrow, Park. I don’t know when I’ll see you again. That deserves more than, ‘it’s not goodbye’. - Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell
This is my favorite scene in the book. Because it’s really what we feel and hope for when are letting go of someone, ‘it’ not goodbye’. It’s cliche and pathetic but we cling to it. We hope that it’s really not goodbye even if reality slaps us with the truth, that it’s done. We lie to ourselves, we lie to that someone for the hopes of saving the memories built and shared.
I liked how Eleanor said truthfully her feelings to Park. When she said what she said, she demonstrated how she valued, cared, and loved Park. She did not give false hopes. She let go for both of them even if it hurts.
I like the book because it’s not just about a silly puppy teenage love. It’s actually some reality that even adults can’t see.
Each of us have some insecurities in our bodies. Some handles it well, others not. If we could not deal our own issues with life, how can we cope up with the issues of the other. That’s where “clingy” and “needy” comes in the picture. That’s where dependency starts. And that’s usually the time relationship rocks. We then get afraid of losing somebody because no one will help us with ourselves. That’s how we cling to our relationships even if we are getting miserable. Words come out hurting our self- esteem. Tears, then, get spilled. We retaliate with words that could also pain the other person. And when realization hits of how we selfishly need them, we come running to that person, begging on bended knees, to save the so- called relationship. And then The Saga begins. It will be a bitter cycle. Each cycle hurts more than the previous cycle. Each cycle, we cling more. Each cycle, we lose ourselves.
Reality sucks but it’s true. There are a lot like that everywhere we go. Even media says so.
And I am proud of people who had the courage to leave, let go, move on and be a better person not just for others but for theirselves. Just like what Mandy Hale said in one of her books, we find someone not to complete us but to compement us.
Sylvia Plath. 1932-1963
“I can never read all the books I want; I can never be all the people I want and live all the lives I want. I can never train myself in all the skills I want. And why do I want? I want to live and feel all the shades, tones and variations of mental and physical experience possible in life. And I am horribly limited.”
And now I am craving for chocolate cake. Will I or will I not?
maroutaylor This is for the best. There are reasons for everything. LEARN. And never feel bad about it. ;)
It’s never easy to leave,
to walk away from anyone
or anything that you love to death
(and sometimes it feels so literal)
but when you know that you can state your case
with confidence in your stride,
when you realize that things will not change
and the only thing left to do is to walk away
then it is logical to take the first step—
It is never easy.